You looked at tons of pictures of the prospects in your area, and even emailed a few. If you play your cards right you’ll get some responses from a few, trade a few emails then you’re at the trading pictures stage. You’ll be your charming self and soon you’ll get emails or texts with a few pics to pique your interest. They’ll be pretty tame, her out with the girls raising a colorful drink with an umbrella in it, or him at an office party in a business suit looking professionally fine. It won’t take long (trust me on that one) before you’re on to more provocative stuff. You go crazy when she sends you the pics of her topless and/or naked and your juices will flow like it hasn’t in years when you see him in that bathing suit on the beach. Things look good, they’re ripe for the picking, all you have to do is go get them.
And go get it you do.
Soon you meet, and let’s face it, who can resist you, that charm, that smile, and soon you’re in their arms having the time of your life, feeling like you haven’t felt in years. You leave sated and smiling maybe with some sexy pics or even video on your phone for you to remember the good times by. You’re feeling fulfilled for the first time in God knows how long and of course you want more and so does she so you set up your rendezvous by text and email. Then…wait…hear that? What’s that sound? No it’s not moans of pleasure as you watch the video of your performance in the motel off Route 69, it’s the tick tick tick of the time bombs called your phone and your computer. What you’ve just done is set up your spouse with everything they needs to know to totally screw you. IF they knows how to find it. And trust me. They know how to find it.
Every sanitization process must begin with the cell phone, the thing that some think is their biggest ally but in reality is the thing that will give them away the quickest. I can’t tell you how many stories I’ve heard of cell phones bringing a screeching halt to many a relationship. Oh, you’ll start out being careful but it only takes one text or picture you forget to delete or one phone call at the wrong time to turn your world upside down. Also, your demeanor will be your biggest ally in your quest to keep your secret. Suspicious spouses sniff out nervousness like a bloodhound. If the moment you come home you hide your phone or act all nervous about it it’s only a matter of time before your partner suspects something and once that happens your days are numbered. Sanitize that phone so you can live secure in the knowledge that there is nothing there that can incriminate you.
Get rid of everything on the phone that you don’t want her to see. Delete all pictures, texts and phone numbers that could put you in hot water. If you have one of those phones (like a BlackBerry) that you backup do a fresh backup after you delete everything and make sure to delete the old backup file.
Get a throwaway. A throwaway is one of those cell phones you buy with prepaid minutes. As the name implies should things get hairy you can simply chuck it and it’s no big loss. I’ll go more into the throwaway and its proper use later.
Sanitize your computer. This is a more time-consuming endeavor than the phone but very, very important. Your computer is a leaky bucket that has the potential to incriminate you in 100 different ways.
Not to worry, you can defuse those ticking time bombs with a few easy to follow steps, that I’ll go into in detail in my next post.
Until next time, if you can’t be faithful, be careful.